It is almost embarrassing to fall in love as I approach 40 years of age. We’re grown ups and yet these days our eyes see color more vividly; words from each other’s lips have a deep meaning and impact in our swelling hearts; we lounge with greater gratitude for the moments in repose together and relish in every breath that the other takes. Turns out it was more than a summer romance and being in love can indeed make the most modest of beds feel palatial by virtue of being nestled in each other’s arms. Falling in love makes ordinary sighs, kisses and nuzzles feel like brushes with heaven’s own Aphrodite.
We’ve both experienced many streams of life already. It almost feels like we should have tapped out a few historic relationships ago and just made peace with the leftovers; that which remained after the winnings were collected and the dealers went home. I’ve thought this deep well of kindness, delight and easy rapport with a man wasn’t in the cards for me. A beautiful home, sure. And being a mother, absolutely. Awesome trips and hot-dates bachelors, why not? But real love for a man whom I am enamoured with and who cherishes me? I had my doubts. In the absence of this dream having not yet coming true, my no plan plan was to simply get on with my robust life and be a muse to myself, amusing myself along the way. Pretty good deal.
Yet the poppy seed-sized wish for romantic love and sweet partnership embedded in the smooth tissue of my heart began to flourish. Slowly, steadily and quite unnoticed, the roots took delicate shape around my body’s biggest involuntary muscle and without an announcement the flowers opened their delicate petals to reveal the bull’s-eye center of a wish granted. And there he was – bringing a smile to my face and a large laugh to my happy belly, hugging my little body close, protecting us with all he thinks and does and all he asks for is me to enjoy the delightful ride. So here we are, as adults, back at square one of child-like wonderment, sophomoric silliness in-love-drunkenness. You can grasp why I say this sweet nectar of adoring love between us is ever so slightly embarrassing.
The interesting piece of this equation is the very je ne sais quoi of why it works. And why now? Why the lover’s puzzle pieces snap their way into interlocking, perfect union this time around, though we’ve both had a hearty spin of Cupid’s wheel in our previous romantic incarnations. I rested in this question and keep circling back to the only answer of worth.
Something about this love is familiar. I’ve tasted it before. And the yearning for that sweetness has led the charted course of my life to exactly this moment, this late night, this revelation and this sweet note. There is more to this story than just the two of us devoted sweethearts in it. There is the One.
That Oneness is the pulse of all Love on the planet. Even just a hint of that manifesting as a micro in our tender relationship is enough to fuel rocket ships and satiate million man marches. The One is the origin of all things. The One is the ceaseless Love that is Spirit alive in the world, inside each of us. Oneness is comprised simply of Love.
The Love is ancient and It is all that there really is, when you burn off the fat of karma and reincarnational patterns. It is most certainly older than my heaven-sent boyfriend and my age combined! Yet our love affair is very deeply steeped in this Love because I, as a student of Dr. Lane’s, am constantly Attuning and re-Attuning to this high Frequency and filling my cup with this Love through the Mediation Of The Light Of The Most High that Dr. Lane Teaches. This flow is within me and from this place I’m involved in a deeply loving relationship; unattached and unabashed to be mySelf. I am Free to fully be Free.
I walk through the world just like everyone else and enjoy the same pleasures only more so because I’m free inside myself to be in the fullness of what is. At each-and-every moment. It is similar to being on vacation yet in my hometown. At home inside myself and with deep, ever-replenishing gratitude, endless Love and no need to even fuss with international exchange rates.
This way of living is free. Regardless of my age, stage or stats because all that matters is the ever-increasing Frequencies of Love inside myself. That’s the real joy – living in the vast, constantly-sourced tide of unfettered adoration within me. From that place I move in the world and I relate to my endearing beau, enjoying our magical mystery tour thoroughly. I relish in the strong current and tender warmth of manna from heaven that lives alive and bright inside of me, as me.
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