Have you ever had the experience of “battling” with a loved one? Recently, I had been battling with my four-year old son. In the past month we moved into a new house and welcomed a second son into the family. I’m certain my four-year old’s behavior was due to all the change that had occurred in our family. To be honest, I was feeling some growing and adjusting pains, too. Even though I intellectually knew that my son was having a hard time adjusting and his unpleasant and even violent behavior was a result of this, when he started to push my buttons my response was to push back. We battled like this for about three weeks until finally I found a solution. It was, of course, Love.

Dr. Roger B. Lane, Founder/Director of Cosmos Tree says in the Tools For Living Free #58 “What Is Love?” , “… ‘Love’ stands for ‘Letting go Of Volition Every time.’” Dr. Lane goes on to say, “…when we unleash our emotions; … and our insistence upon what others should do; … we’ve chosen into and unleashed karma.” With my son I kept insisting he act a certain way and with mySelf I kept insisting and persisting in the frustration I was feeling about his behavior. When that did not solve the conflict between us, I decided to follow Dr. Lane’s Teaching to Let go of my Volition and choose into Love.

One morning my son was raging about something. I stopped myself from my usual response of yelling and demanding and instead just said, “son, I love you.” He immediately stopped screaming at me, looked directly at me and said, “I love you too.”

Through my work with Dr. Lane and Cosmos Tree, which offers many Tools/Resources to help one live free and Spirit-centered, I’ve learned that What Spirit-centered means is living in Love. ‘Letting go Of Volition Every time’ with others – but (more importantly) with mySelf. It is Loving mySelf enough to surrender my agenda and stay Present. It is saying to mySelf, like I did with my son, when I am raging or feeling out of control, “I love you” and letting go of any negativity I may be feeling. I do this by saying, “For the Highest Good Lord, God, take this (frustration/worry/anger, etc.)!” And then I tell mySelf, “(my name), it’s OK to let it go!”

It likely goes without saying that this solution is not a one-time, quick-fix kind of thing. When I extended the Love to my son and he stopped in his rage tracks we had a pleasant afternoon that day. Since then we’ve had moments again that felt as if we were on the brink of war. That is why the Teaching is ‘Letting go Of Volition EVERY time’ and not ‘Letting go Of Volition One time’.

If you feel yourself on the brink of war with a loved one or within yourSelf, I Lovingly encourage you to choose Love over war. If you need assistance on what That means or how to do It – check out the Tools/Resources offered here on the Cosmos Tree website. The Tools For Living Free page is a great place to start as it combines valuable excerpts from the Enlightening Monthly Talks given by Dr. Lane with short exercises that you can do during the day to help you be present; live more Joyously and Peacefully; and focus into the Spirit you are. Additionally, experience the other free Resources on the site, like the monthly Podcasts, and even visit the New York Center in-person to attend one of the many Meditations offered!

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